Monday, February 22, 2010

10 Reasons I Won't Get A Myspace.

This is no creative piece of poetry or songwriting whatsoever.
However.
If I had a dollar for every time I've been told to get a myspace. I could buy the effing website.
Therefore, to prove my point. I'm going to post here. My blog that allows me to space properly.
(Oh, Alisha, You have more than one?!)
Why yes. Kind parton. I do.
*hauls her lazy typing rear over to her AIM buddy info to get the link she made up and no surprise, forgot*
(Insert Here)

Anyhow. Here We Go.

10. The "Myspace Profile Pic*
We've all seen it. Observe the teenage girl at her natural habitat. The macbook. Notice the acne gathering on her face as its somehow burned by the radiation of the screen which now has a image of guestbooking and commenting burned in. And observe her profile picture. Her eyes, drenched in liner, is staring in some odd direction like a confused Blondie.(No offence. I love you light haired people.) Her lips, scrunched to the side of her face like theres a lemon in her mouth, making a kissy face. And we have the ever popular peace sign! *Sigh* It's better than the D-Bags who take pictures without there shirt on.

9. FDS. Also Known As Facebook Deprevincy Syndrome.
I am a facebooker. I admit it, a social networker. As much as I strongly dislike every app that ends in the words "Life, Ville, Pets, ext." or starts in the word "Happy". I would miss it. As much as I dislike saying it, Things would feel incomplete without a page full of "Alisha Marie has gained to level 45 in Farmville and gained 4 more cows!" No, I don't play it. But Being the creative writer I am, The name I would make up would probably exist.

9. Continued.
What apps does myspace even have anyway! and what else is myspace except for some pictures on a page and status updates. Facebook is for people like me who prefer not to be bombarded with probably sucky music when she goes to write happy birthday on her friends wall.
Oh wait. you don't have a wall, you have profiles.

8. Profiles.
I just want to take a broom, and sweep it across my computer screen when I come across a profile.
Its so, so, out of control.
for example. I added a picture of the typical facebook page.

I have no idea where it is..
but. its there. somewhere.
Look at how clean cut it is. In its lists, and updates, all in columns and
*sigh* how lovely.
Then theres the myspace page. Of which I'll add later, for it's about midnight on a schoolnight so im on guest for easyness.

So anyhow. We notice the uneeded pictures that are love quotes that prove desperate.
The insanely complicated backgrounds that make it hard to see what your saying.
Which is prolly totally inhuman and not using a single complete word.
"OMG WI GOT2 HGOUT SAT!"

7. Like I really need anything else on the Internet.

2 blogs+
1 Facebook+
1 Website+
1 Twitter+
1 Flickr+
1 Yahoo!+
1 YouTube+
1 AIM=
9 Places where I'm already exposed.
I don't think i need to continue with this one.

6. I did have a myspace
I already had one, It bored me to tears.
That's about it.

5. My Schedule
Get up
Go to school
get back
do homework
go skating
come back
go on facebook
talk to friends
bed.

No vacancy's.

4.Your army will not take me down.
I'm a facebooker. You could call me General Facebook. I got one friend to go on, and another friend, and we all got together and ganged up on other friends to get them. I know the strength of a social network army. And I know you have no power past persuasion.

3.Conceited Drama
Nobody really uses there relationship status on FB. On myspace though, not only do they use it, but they abuse it. It's going to annoy the heck out of me. Theres nothing more really too this. But its a lot to me.

2. You don't get no (guitar riff) satisfaction.
Ha ha. I love watching people beg.

1. I DON'T WANT TO.
Is this clear? Is this thing on? No. I don't want a myspace.

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